The Hidden Key to Better Resilience, Self-Esteem, and Confidence

“The loudest clock isn’t always the one that keeps the best time.”

Next Monday, I’ll be a guest on a webinar where we’ll be discussing a topic close to my heart: Building Emotional Resilience.

For me, emotional resilience is deeply connected to Self-Esteem (SE) and Confidence (C)—two pillars that help us not just survive but thrive in life.

I’ve shared bits and pieces of my personal story in these emails, but for those who don’t know, in my mid-20s, I hit rock bottom. Depression had taken over, and my self-esteem and confidence were virtually non-existent. Climbing out of that dark place took time—years, in fact. But during that journey, I wasn’t just rebuilding—I was actively seeking to understand these crucial aspects of my inner world.

What I could never have predicted back then was how foundational that understanding would become for my work today.

Here’s the thing that still shocks me, even now:

Low self-esteem is one of the primary reasons people feel unfulfilled or unsuccessful, both personally and professionally.

And here’s what’s even more surprising: Often, the people who appear to have the highest self-confidence are the ones with the lowest SE. They’re often overcompensating for something deep inside them that’s off—something they haven’t brought into the light of awareness yet. It’s easy to miss this because, externally, they’re achieving great things. But internally, the struggle continues.

We don’t always realise how deeply our self-esteem affects the way we handle challenges, relationships, and opportunities. Instead, we focus on external achievements, hoping they’ll fix how we feel inside. But that rarely works.

What changed everything for me was discovering that the keys to resilience, self-esteem, and confidence aren’t something you need to chase or “earn”—they’re innate. They already exist inside you, waiting to be uncovered and nurtured.

Here’s the crucial insight:

Building these qualities isn’t about adding anything new to yourself—it’s about removing the thinking that’s blocking your natural SE and C from emerging. When you do that, you reveal the innate strength and potential that’s been there all along.

As I prepare for the webinar next Monday, I invite you to reflect on this:

• Where in your life do you feel your confidence is “off”?
• How can you remind yourself that the resilience and self-worth you seek are already within you, just waiting to be rekindled?

We often underestimate our resilience and inner strength, but the truth is, it’s all there—waiting for us to uncover it.

Best,

Shane

PS – Sleep and wellbeing expert, Fiona Brennan, is the host for next Monday’s webinar(7th Oct) at 7pm GMT. If you’d like to attend online, you can register here.

The Inner Edge Podcast – Most Recent Episode:

Ep 199: The Joy Of Beating Yourself Up 🙂

Listen on my website here or on all major podcasting platforms.

Up Your Game: Have you checked out my online academy? It has a range of products that will help you raise your game in all areas. More details here.