“We don’t see things as they are, we see them as we are.”
– Anaïs Nin

In my book The Inner CEO, I use a simple metaphor to explain how our minds work:

• Your mind is like a projector.
It doesn’t show you what’s out there.
It shows you what you’re looking through.

And what you’re looking through is often… distorted.


Old beliefs. Unspoken expectations. Bruised ego. Insecurity. Overthinking.
We forget that what feels true in the moment might just be a passing storm on our inner lens. (And we all have one)

I was reminded of this recently in a conversation that never actually happened.


Someone didn’t say something… and I started to imagine what they were thinking.
Before long, a whole story had formed in my head.


But was it real? Or just my projector at work?

It’s easy to forget that the people around us have reasons for their choices.
Agreements they’ve made. Contexts we don’t see.


And when our expectations aren’t met — especially by those we care about

— the projector whirs into action.

We start looking through hurt.
Through ego.
Through “they should have…”
And suddenly, possibility is gone.


Not because it was never there. But because the lens we’re using has clouded the view.

Last week I wrote about the importance of realising that opportunities are everywhere. But here’s something that’s so easy to miss:


• Opportunities don’t land in closed minds.
They land in open ones.

One of the fastest ways to open your mind —
is to ask a deceptively powerful question:

What am I looking through right now?

Not at — but through.

This week, perhaps pause before you judge someone’s action or inaction.
Take a breath before drawing a conclusion.


Ask: What lens am I using to see this situation?

Then ask: Can I be 100% sure that what I’m thinking is true?

You might just find that clarity — and more importantly, possibility — were hiding in plain sight.

Best,

Shane

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